A muddled mess: Mortuary

Posted by Cory Casciato On February - 27 - 2009

mortuaryIt’s hard to believe Tobe Hooper directed Mortuary, a steaming pile of crap about a mortuary built over the lair of a Lovecraftian beasty that can reanimate the dead. Note to developers: storing dead people over a creature capable of reanimating them is a bad idea. Note to filmmakers (the ones who made this, and any others out there): cramming in half a dozen subplots doesn’t keep me interested, it just makes them all underdeveloped and leads to gaping plot holes. You’ve got a romance subplot, a bullying rowdy supplot, the crazy sheriff, the city councilman who may or may not know what’s going on, you’ve got the scary deformed kid who once lived in the house, the family secrets, the … blech, I lost track at some point. The other big problem with this movie is it takes forever to get going, then crams all the good stuff — not that it’s actually very good, mind you, because the writing is terrible –  into the last 25 minutes. So it’s slow, slow, slow, then chaotic and incoherent. Fun! Only, not really. At least most of the cast was decent, so only some of the acting was painful.

2 Responses to “A muddled mess: Mortuary

  1. Biddie says:

    I am almost certain that I own this. I am almost equally as certain that I have never seen it all the way through…
    I had no idea that this was a Tobe Hooper crap fest.
    Did I tell you that I met him last year? I have some pics around here somewhere….

  2. Biddie says:

    By the way, Happy Birthday! Hope it’s great!
    Biddie

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